Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Oh dear

I was happily drawing yesterday morning when Dov knocked on my door. When I answered it was to find that he and another neighbour where going to a music shop right near one of the art shops I go to. I asked if I could go along and he said yes.

We ran downstairs and met E and hopped in her car and off we went. About twenty minutes later we stopped at the music store and we jumped out and went inside. Oh course I got the urge to go to the woodwind section, my favourite because I used to play sax and clarinet. This guy came over and wanted to know if he could help me and I said maybe. I asked about both sax and clarinet and well... err... sigh...

meet Clary

I couldn't seem to help myself. I got the student clarinet because I don't know yet whether I'll keep it going. At the moment I am just renting it for a few months and then I'll decide what to do. I did play all afternoon much to the amusement of Dov. 

It has been a long time but it was fun. I put it together in no time flat and then the first few tries were no noise, then duck noises and then I blew my first note. Within half an hour I had a scale and then part of a song. I had trouble trying to hold it so today I am going back to get a neck strap as I am a bit sore today.

This morning I am going to sketch and cartoon. It should be fun. The I have my outreach person and the the music shop and then it's music time where Dov will ask me for a note and I will probably play a note too low. I did find a clarinet fingering chart online but it doesn't seem to help yet. Like I said it's been a while. It will be busy day I think.

Sarah xx

Monday, November 25, 2013

therapuetic fun

I posted a few days ago some drawings and a cartoon. Well I have found it really helpful in staying well, as I can get my frustration, anger, fear among some emotions I feel. I thought I'd share with you a few more drawings. These have some weird shadows on them when I tried to colour correct them. It didn't really work. I found out too today that there is an art group where I live on Tuesdays. I am excited about that.

I know this is gross but I was tried to play with colour and this popped into my head. Well it's a virus actually. Charming I know.

My grasshopper

Some pretty leaves

A bird and a flower

My fun cartoon about finding out I could draw

I saw my psychiatrist today and she had a look at my work and she said she is happy I am doing it because it is like practicing mindfulness. You are so focused on your art that you forget everything else. I like that about it and you get so drawn in. Dov is next door playing his piano and his loaned guitar. He is such a beautiful musician. I am just so happy with life right now. Although it is not all happy. I had three moles cut out last week. Two in my left breast and on my right. They are sore. My GP says he is certain they are nothing but to be safe he took all of them out anyway.

Anyway, I hope you are all doing okay. I know I come and go these days but that was partly to do with having no internet. I have missed it here. I those of you that celebrate Thanksgiving have an awesome time. To everyone else, have a great day anyway :)

Sarah xx

Sunday, November 24, 2013

What I've been up to

It's been such an awesome time for me lately. I have been out of hospital for two months and I am making the commitment to stay out this time. I know what me being in does for Dov and I know how powerless I feel when I am in there and how all I long for is to be home. So why not make it that home is what I have all the time. Yes, I think so!!!

So far I am doing so well and I am coming off of some medication, zyprexa and seroquel-XR. So far so good. I am completely off the zyprexa and I start going off the seroquel tomorrow. I am not using PRN medication anymore. I was put on restricted access to all my medication a while ago when I was  over-medicating on seroquel. It was not pretty. I was frantically stockpiling as much medication as I could get my hands on.

I am past that now. It feels like it was another life, I'm glad it's gone now, I don't want to be her. She was desperate and a drug addict. It feels strange to say that out loud. I didn't have a physical addiction to seroquel but definitely a psychological one. These days it's my pens and pencils I turn to and any of my art stuff for that matter. I love to draw and I just got some pastels, will be trying them out later. For my birthday I got an easel. It's just the beginning for me. What an amazing discovery.

I look forward to other amazing discoveries. More later!

Sarah xx

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Excitement - update

I've re-discovered that I can actually draw. I am excited about this because it's opened up a whole world for me. I have also learned that I can do cartoons. Here is one of my drawings of an elephant. Sorry about the shadows from the camera.

The very first time I could see I could draw

This is one square of my cartooning

 This is actually a cartoon of Dov

Let me know what you guys think? I am getting better at little cartoons though. I am very excited with this all opening up for me and I think with my better drawings that I have done since these. I am even considered doing some cartoon zines or as I get better every day with all the practice, at some time doing a self published graphic novel. It's very exciting indeed. A girl can dream!

Sarah xx